Monday, December 31, 2007

Whoops! Bears back on bottom.


Bad news Bears. You went from first to worst in the NFC North, and the team you love to hate is back on top. That's right Lovie, the Pack is Back, sitting comfortably in first place.

I know Bear fans you feel pretty good about winning on a high note and all, but I hope that gets you through your winter. Remember after your long winters nap that even though 2008 is a brand new year...you still got the same quarterback problems, aging defense and a coach who was just a flash in the pan. Enjoy the playoffs!

Thursday, December 27, 2007

What kind of city is it? Windy.

I'd like to sit here and pretend that I'm devastated that the Pack lost twice to an inferior Bears team. I'd like to. But I'm not all that devastated. I'm not even really bummed. In the grand scheme of things this loss hits me like when you're sitting at home and the wife said she'd get ice cream and then she shows up and she doesn't have anything from DQ because the line was too long or whatever. You just sort of shrug your shoulders and say "well, I'll have it some other day." That's how I'm feeling.

So sorry Bears fans - your owner's still an evil witch, you still have to look at yourselves in the mirror and try to forget that you talked yourself into liking the White Sox a couple years ago just so you could see a team win it all even though that team has no fans as commanded by God after Satan corrupted them in 1919, you still lead the charge in the NFC North for "Team Name that makes everyone want to tell gay jokes" and will stay that way until Detroit does the sensible thing and renames themselves the Polesitters, and finally, no, you didn't convince me to give up writing about the Packers each week. That was Christmas Vacation. Not you.

I'm actually thankful for this game. If the Packers play that poorly in bad weather why in hell would I want them to have another home playoff game? Dallas looks pretty good right now if you ask me. Now if you'll excuse me I think Jon Ryan needs a hug.

Thursday, December 20, 2007

Green Bay Packers (11-2) at St. Louis Rams (3-10)

Let's play a game. It's called "Guess what MF and the C&P crew were up to this week." I'll even make it multiple choice.

A. Busted making counterfeit Chicago Bears playoff tickets (really should have stopped after, say, week #3).
B. Working really, really effing hard at their "real" jobs.
C. Consoling the single women of Burlington now that we know Tony went for that blonde bimbo Jessica Simpson.
D. Arrested for supposedly "stalking" Jon Kitna. How can it be "stalking" when I was sitting innocently on his driveway and HE nearly ran into ME? Is it so wrong that I wanted to know how Jonny felt about God changing his whole mind on the 10 wins guarantee? By the way, I know that saying God cares about football games is pretty stupid but I think we can all agree he would have to be prominently involved for the Lions to get to double digits in wins right?

Sadly, the true answer is B. But the others were considered. I work in the home loan business and "end of month" and "end of year" are two phrases that basically mean "work through lunch" and "try not to forget the faces of your family." So yeah, basically we suck and we're sorry. So please, give us a break. That means you Butch and Coach Carl and Spoonie Love and all the people who actually sorta miss us when we're too tired and/or lazy to post. Now then, onto the game recap, enough of these shenanigans.

A few notes from this game:

  • We need a nickname for Mason Crosby. Sure he sounds like a smooth southern attorney now, but we need something with flair. For his standard kicks I think we can call him "Bing" Crosby. For one thing my PR people say this will help our hit counts with the older folks (hey ma!) and for another it's just sorta fun to yell "Bing!" in an obnoxious manner towards the opposing team's fans. Also, and this is the key to this whole thing, when Mason decides to hit one of those bizarre knuckler, no spin jobs like he did from 46 this week we must, we absolutely must call him "Bada Bing" Crosby. So named for the strip club on the Sopranos. This name is perfect because much like when going to a strip club, when he hits one of those watermelons you feel like you're about to get fucked, but not quite (bye ma! sorry!). It's really perfect when you think about it.
  • KoRo, Chuck Wood, Blackmon, Tramon - yeah, they're all pretty good at returning kicks. Isn't it nice to have a special teams unit that legitimately scares the other teams? This team has all sorts of ways it can beat you. That's funtastic.
  • Brett Favre now has all the records in the book. Both good and bad. Because dammit, he wanted 'em all. If Brett Favre was a writer on the internets he'd be the opposite of the C&P staff. Heck, you'd have posts every day. I was really happy to see this record setting pass go to Driver. Is there a receiver with more class in the NFL today? I hope he doubles his season TD total against the Bears.
  • We're all on a rotation. Rouse rotates in at safety. The CB's shift places so much the other team's QB thinks he's playing Whack-A-Mole. And now Ruvell Martin is in on routes with one WR. I like that we're sort of secretly resting guys but not really. Mike Mac is cagey. I've almost convinced myself all the stupid deep passes in the Dallas game were really just a ruse by Mike so that he wouldn't show Dallas what our real offense is like. Almost.
  • Apropos of nothing, if the world was somehow infested with zombies, how long would it take for us to realize Ted Thompson is still "normal" Ted? I say three or four hits with a baseball bat to the noggin before he told us to knock it off. Then he'd sign a fullback off the waiver wire and Mike Vandermouse would be writing about how the guy has a legit shot at the Pro Bowl as an alternate by season's end. Ted's a lot like Stephen Hawking, brilliant mind hidden behind a facade of weakness. Or a facade of a knuckle dragging ogre. Either/or, really.
  • Holy shit I just compared Ted Thompson to Stephen Hawking.
  • In the past two weeks, against admittedly craptastic teams, the Packers have won by 31 (at home) and 19 (on the road). All season long I've sort of just been thinking that this year is really just a stepping stone to next year's title run. But I'm an idiot. This team has a very strong case that it's the #3 team in the country right now, and number #1 (Patriots) and #2 (Colts) have to fight it out to see who goes to the Bowl.

I'm gonna end on that note. We all know the Cowgirls are still around. We know the O-line needs to solidify what it's doing and the Defense needs to not give up 150 yards on the ground. But wow. This is fun.

Monday, December 10, 2007

Mike Mac's Domination Machine

Oakland Raiders (4-8) at Green Bay Packers (10-2)

Lambeau Field - Kevin Harlan and Rich Gannon in the booth. The always fantastic Ed Hochuli reffing the game.

KGB, Chuck Woodson and Brett Favre all return to the lineup.

There were some entertaining moments in the Packer's dominating win over the Raiders, here's what stood out to me.

  • Will Blackmon may just have a future in the league. His punt return for a TD (kinda) was terrifying and easy all at the same time. When the return man decides to catch the ball on the run in traffic I usually scream something that sounds like a little girl watching her favorite doll get eaten by a pitbull "nooooooooo." But a few moves later we had a TD (kinda) on the board. He also was involved in the tackle and fumble recovery of for a TD (for real) in the end zone. Blackmon may just be one of those guys who has "it."
  • Early in the game the Packers weren't finishing drives and Favre looked to be about 100 years old after taking a hit to the legs. The cold didn't look like much fun. Kevin Harlan basically pleaded for Rich Gannon to dissect his game, his injury, etc. Y'know, provide the QB's perspective sort of thing. Gannon either didn't understand that he should provide some analyis or just steadfastly refused. He eventually muttered something about Favre loving the cold. Harlan was clearly annoyed that he couldn't get a real answer. Even my dog was embarrassed for him. And my dog licks places on himself that pretty much forgo any possible shame you can put on a guy, so that tells ya something.
  • Jam Russell doesn't like the cold. They showed the Raider's QB of the future on the sidelines. Perhaps he was auditioning for the role of Snake Eyes in the new GI Joe movie or something. Completely bundled up with just a small slit for his eyes exposed to the elements. I know he wasn't playing but that wasn't a real positive sign.
  • This Packer team is legitimately good. We got 14 points from special teams (solid returns AND good coverage), scored 24 points on offense (and left 6-10 points on the field, easy) and didn't give up anything on D other than one drive where Jerry Porter had to be perfect to pull the ball away from Al Harris, who was covering him perfectly. This game could have easily been 44-3.
  • Ryan Grant can play. I know the Raiders have a terrible Run D, but 156 yards is 156 yards. It's nice to see us rolling up the running game as the weather turns craptacular. I've gone from worrying about him, to feeling surprised about him, to feeling really dang good about the guy in just 8 weeks. If he keeps this up I may have to show up for a vicious fanny slap on him like Favre gave Juice Coston after the Don Lee TD.
  • Speaking of the fanny slap, I know people hate the incredibly tired "Favre has fun out there" mantra but I'd be lying if I didn't rewind that on the Tivo and show the wife. She loves that sort of stuff. Personally I just find it entertaining when Juice Coston turns around, sees Brett with a goofy grin on his face and then starts laughing.
  • Nick Barnett's a stud. He doesn't seem to get much credit but the guy makes tackles all over the place. He rocked McCown's world repeatedly and made a number of tackles in the backfield to keep the Raiders down.
  • Most of all, it was nice to see a crappy team come to town and just KNOW that the Packers were going to win. The final score is just another reason to feel good. It wasn't close. It was never close. The Packers calmly stood on the Raiders throats until the whistle blew. This team looks damn good.

Thursday, November 29, 2007

Recap! Green Bay Packers (10-1) at Dallas Cowboys (10-1)

NFL Network - Cris Collinsworth and Bryant Gumbel

Collinsworth is a decent announcer. He takes shots at players that are sometimes unwarranted, but at least he takes them. Most guys are afraid to mention anyone in the NFL is capable of a mistake. Gumbel is terrible. He makes mistakes constantly, refers to the wrong team/player/spot of the ball repeatedly and in general just doesn't seem to be up to speed on the teams.

I'm not up to the normal recap tonight. There were a number of points of interest tonight and I want to focus on them, not on how awesome a certain play was. Sorry if you were hoping to read more about my awkward non-sexual mancrush on Don Driver. So, without further nonsense, my POINTS...OF...INTEREST...

  1. Mason Crosby has ice in his veins. Or blood. Probably blood. But icy. Coldblooded? No, he's a warm-blooded mammal. Focused blood! Yes! Focused! He hit from 47 and 52. Both no-doubters. Good to see from the Rook on the road in his first high pressure game.
  2. KGB and Chuck Woodson are kinda important to our success. It took awhile for the Packers defense to really step up in this game. In fact, it really hasn't happened yet. The absence of Chuck, KGB (and Jolly, Cole, Rouse...) certainly showed up in the game. Romo had time (KGB) and open receivers (Chuck).
  3. Jarret Bush was postively Ahmad Carroll-esque. He pretty much singlehandedly gave up 3 touchdowns. Two literally (including one to Anthony Fasano, who is about as athletic as a turkey sandwich) and one thanks to a pass interference call on the 5 when he was beaten like a redheaded stepchild by Pat Crayton.
  4. The O-line needs some help. Again injuries played a part. Tauscher may as well have been rocking a pegleg thanks to his bum ankle. He was tough, but he was also slow. Some blitzes weren't picked up at all, some just weren't blocked.
  5. Brett Favre got hurt. It looked painful as hell. A Cowboy DB hit him in the elbow with his helmet as he was throwing. He left the game in the 2nd quarter and did not return. Hopefully he's going to show his resiliency and bounce back yet again for next week.
  6. The offensive playcalling was a complete nightmare for the first 20 minutes or so of the game. Much like the abomination that was the Washington game we repeatedly had deep passes called and absolutely no rhythm going thanks to those long incompletions. There were two factors that lead directly to this loss, the playcalling early in the game is one of them.
  7. Al Harris got fucked on national TV. Terrell Owens made a catch on the sideline and Al took the ball from him and went out of bounds. It was clear in the replays that it should have been Packer ball on their own 35 or so. The refs stated that Owens was stopped with forward progress. Despite the fact that the play sequence went like this...Owens jumps, catches, comes down, gets stripped, end of play. The refs tacked on a delay of game penalty after the play too. Of course Al ran around like an idiot! He just got fucked on national TV! Also, the ref reviewed the play and upheld it. He should have been fired on the spot. The refs are the second big reason this was a loss. Beyond missing an obvious turnover early in the game they also called Tramon Williams for pass interference with 5 minutes to play on the Packer 5 yard line. It was a terrible call. The ref was 10 feet away and initially signaled no penalty but was overruled by the side judge who was 20 yards away. Topnotch work gents! Why not let the players decide the game?
  8. While the coaching staff gets an F for their early game playcalls they get an A for changing their plans mid-game. Bush gets lit up for 3 td's? Out of the game, hello Tramon. O-Line can't hold a block, Colledge comes out. Deep passes not getting completed? Mix up the run and the short pass. If we had done this from the start we probably win this game.
  9. Good News! We have a player! Ryan Grant continues to run well in his few opportunities. I particularly enjoyed his 62 yard TD run on 3rd and 1 in the second quarter. He broke through the line and the safeties in 2 seconds and then covered up and completely sprinted to the back of the end zone. No jogging, no highstepping, just cover up and run.
  10. Good News 2! We have a player! After Favre went down I think most people in the country assumed the game was over. If nothing else people were interested to see what Aaron Rodgers could do. Hoping for a field goal or two at least. He was excellent. Sure he had some issues with a few busted plays but he had no turnovers, 200+ yards passing, a completion percentage around 70% and he picked up 30 yards with his feet, which I'm sure Dallas didn't gameplan for.

I think we've learned a lot from this game. Assuming Favre is okay I actually feel better about our chances now then I did prior to tonight. Frankly, if the offensive playcalling had been good the whole game and the defense had KGB, Chuck and Jolly back I think we win this one. I know the D looked bad at times but most of that can be attributed to the extended playing time of Bush as the #2 and little pressure on Romo. I don't see that being the case in a rematch.

We lost 37-27. Bush looked terrible. The playcalling was atrocious early. That's the bad news. The good news? Even with our backup QB, backups along the O-line, backups on the D-line and secondary we still pushed them hard. If not for a bullshit pass interference call late in the game we could have won this thing. We're 10-2. Most of us gave this team a chance to win 8 or 9 all year. Let's enjoy the fact that we know who the Cowboys are. They have no idea who the Packers are.

Friday, November 23, 2007

These are the plays of our lives

Recap! Green Bay Packers (9-1) at Detroit Lions (6-4)

Thanksgiving Day

Joe Buck and Troy Aikman in the booth. Scott Green reffing. Injuries - Nick Collins, Bubba Franks out. Every RT employed by the Lions out (or should be).

I'll be straying away from the typical game recap this week for a few reasons. One, it's Thanksgiving and I've got food to eat, wine to drink and people to chat with.

First, a few thoughts on the history of the Thanksgiving Day game. It sucks. I hate it. If not for being labeled a "tradition" I doubt very much it would still be around today. Let me list my gripes for you and please, let me know if I'm wrong*.

  • The game is on when many people are actually sitting down to eat.
  • For people interested in the games it's no fun watching them with people that do not care, like another team, or have children who scream a lot as they ram a toy car into your ankle repeatedly.
  • Scheduling the meal around the game only makes sense if everyone is a fan of the same team.
  • Scheduling anything when many, many people are at your home (or you at theirs) is akin to herding cats.
  • If I ask others (non-Packer fans) to push the dinner back a few hours I'm a jerk on several levels. Consider - I'm asking someone to change the time of a meal. I'm asking them to do this so I can watch people I will never meet play a game. I'm asking them to do this even though I have Tivo and can watch the game at any time. Clearly I'm being a jerk if I do this, and the only recourse is to go eat a delicious meal made for me by loving family members who like it when I swing by ONCE A YEAR. The only negative is that every time someone tries to speak to me/call me/text me is my first comment to them is "don't tell me about the game." Which stalls the conversation awkwardly.

So yeah, thanks a lot for the stupid tradition NFL. I especially enjoy going to play at Detroit. They've been awful for 50 years! This is their Super Bowl! The franchise is 33-33-2 (.500) on Thanksgiving. They're 60 games below .500 for their other 1000 games. This is their one shot at glory.

Fortunately the Packers are better at passing the ball, running the ball and stopping both of those activities on Defense. The boys come through with a 37-26 win that sounds closer than it was. Other than a stumble (literally) on the first drive they were unstoppable.

Favre sets a team and personal record with 20 straight completions. He sets an NFL record with yet another 3 TD passing day (breaking Marino's record of 62). He throws 41 times and completes 31, I'm not mathematician but that seems to be awfully good.

Ryan Grant somehow picked up 101 yards. He only had 15 carries but two of them went for 25+ and that always helps the totals. So, the run game continues to improve, even when we barely even acknowledge that running the ball is an option.

I've got a sweet headache so I'm gonna end this now. Enjoy the win. Now we get to find out just how serious this team is. This week we essentially wrapped up the division. A win next week and we'll be on the verge of homefield advantage throughout the playoffs. That sounds like fun.


* I'm not wrong.

Sunday, November 18, 2007

Game Recap! Carolina Panthers (4-5) at Green Bay Packers (8-1)

Dick Stockton and Brian Baldinger will be announcing today's game. Steve Smith and Nick Collins are out with injuries. I've been drinking port wine, eating chex mix and making outlandish statements to my dog all weekend. He's refuted none of them. He's also decidedly unimpressed at my threat to weaponize all kittens with small rocket launchers if he continues to bark at the doorbell ringing on Domino's commercials. In case you're wondering, yes, there is a direct correlation between port wine consumption and number of conversations with the pup.

When the opponent has the ball, the comments are in italics.

1st Quarter

13:33 - I don't really dislike the way Dick and Baldy call a game but they are lazy. All the focus is on this being the Old Bowl thanks to Vinny Testaverde (44) and Brett Favre (38) being the oldest matchup of QB's ever. Well yeah, maybe this has something to do with the fact that up until the 80s/90s these guys didn't even know what to eat, much less what protein shake would be best for their system. If they can perform they can keep on playing, that's easier now than it was 15 years ago. By the way, Aaron Rouse just picked off Vinny on 3rd and 2 at the Carolina 38.

12:33 - The offense can't do anything despite two completions. Crosby lines up from 49 yards. Julius Peppers blocks the kick. I wonder if he runs around yelling "block that kick! block that kick!" and all his teammates just feel awkward because they're picturing the guy from the Bar Joke that "blocked" his buddy's "Fart field goal" with his, um, ahem... So yeah, I wonder if that happens?

8:16 - The Panthers pick up 15-20 yards but can't move it much. Kasay on to kick. And he did! But not in the conventional style you may be accustomed to. Instead of a field goal he went with a pooch punt. Tramon Williams scooped it up at the 6 and with the aid of two great blocks by Johnny Jolly and Atari Bigby he returns it 94 yards for the touchdown! The only bad part of that play was the cameraman. What the hell was he filming?

GREEN BAY 7 - CAROLINA 0

7:00 - Atari Bigby gets beat by Drew (who?) Carter for 44 yards over the middle. 1st down on our 15. Baldy points out that "Atari" means "attack" in Japanese. The translation for "attack so well your opponent quits is ironically* called "xbox."

5:20 - AJ Hawk breaks up the pass in the end zone to force a field goal. Kasay from 26.

GREEN BAY 7 - CAROLINA 3

1:40 - Ok. So Stockton and Baldy just decided that the Packers aren't taking this game seriously because of their upcoming matchups with the Lions and Cowboys. Based on what? The defense playing great? Special teams coming up big? Oh, so if the offense has two, count 'em two, poor series then the team isn't focused?

2nd Quarter

14:40 - On second down from the GB 30 Favre hits Donald Driver for 50 over the middle. Either the playaction was brilliant or it's Intern Day for Fox cameramen. If you ever wanted to know what Ryan Grant looks like 10 yards AFTER acquiring a fake handoff, Jonny Wilson the intern has a great demo reel to show you.

11:13 - Greg Jennings gets open in the back of the end zone on something of a slant for the Touchdown. From the 5. Man, Jennings seems to get open down by the end zone. Surprisingly, the talk about this being a "trap" game has died down.

GREEN BAY 14 - CAROLINA 3

8:53 - This whole play was wiped out by a Kampman offsides penalty but still, it was cool, so I'm gonna mention it. Al Harris ran step for step and made a great, stumble/dive two handed pick of Vinny. I've always really liked Al but he's on lockdown mode this year.

7:11 - The Packer drive stalls out at the Carolina 45. Grant got going with a 20 yard run during the series. Frankly I'm a little unsure what's going on at the moment. After the announcers say "Panthers" the wife keeps on saying "Sex panthers! Mrowwr!" So I got that going for me, which is nice. If she had followed that up with "the Packers win 60 percent of the time, all the time" I probably wouldn't have seen the rest of the game.

5:00 - Wow, these guys are bored already. Some bizarre, fucktarded thing about Favre being Noah and loading up his Ark with young players "two by two." Jennings and Jones, Hall and Grant, etc. I think the analogy falls apart a bit when you realize that in this scenario all of the other teams should have been drowned in the flood. I can certainly understand the Bears being considered an abomination before God but, well, wait a minute, why am I talking about this? I've spent more time thinking about this stupid graphic then the Interns did slapping it together.

1:16 - Driver picks up back to back 1st downs. Grant's got 10 carries for 60 yards. And we have another Touchdown. Don Lee over the middle. He caught the ball amidst three defenders, none of which could have made a play on the ball. Great pass.

GREEN BAY 21 - CAROLINA 3

1:10 - Vinny gets stripped by Corey Williams but manages to recover. That could have sealed the deal on this one. We're on the Carolina 20 by the way.

:32 - Nick Barnett tackles Vinny after a little scramble. As he's going out of bounds Nick gives him a little extra (it looked like he was tripping) and gets flagged 15 yards. That didn't look malicious ref.

:16 - Wow. I want you all to remember the name of Gene Sterratore. It's important. Especially if you work at monster.com or a temp agency. He's gonna be looking for work. His crew somehow managed to throw 2 flags when there were no penalties on the play. Sure, they called Jarret Bush for pass interference, but since he didn't do anything I'm not sure why. His head was turned, looking for the ball. Yet somehow this was missed. Panther 1st down on the Packer 5. The refs have given them 40 yards on this "drive" with BS penalties. Let's see what happens. A good team just rolls with that stuff.

:09 - Excuse me, I need to go manhug Corey Williams. I'll be out for a while. Corey heard my call and stripped Vinny for the second time. Kampman recovers.

3rd Quarter

14:47 - KoRo returns the opening kickoff 70 yards. It's easy to see how he went to the Pro Bowl for special teams in 2005. A couple great moves in there to pick up huge yards.

12:47 - A few Grant runs, and another TD pass to Don Lee. This time for 11 yards. The LB's and Safeties for Carolina just can't stick with Lee or our wideouts.

GREEN BAY 28 - CAROLINA 3

12:35 - 1st play from scrimmage for Carolina in the second half. Chuck Woodson picks Vinny off by jumping a crossing route. That ball was underthrown a bit but Chuck made a great play.

11:02 - The announcers continue their lazy trend by going to the blowout standby, trivia questions. Hey, here's a fun one! Who did Favre complete his 1st pass to in the NFL? It's only been asked in every stupid blowout ever involving the Packers. Can you guess? Can you?
Crosby misses wide right from 49.

3:21 - Well that was painful. The (sex)Panthers(mrowr) just ran the ball on 10 of 12 plays. Vinny hit his backup tight end Christian Fauria for the touchdown. I'm not happy with the touchdown, but I am happy that it took 8 minutes to accomplish. I'm also exstatic that Fauria thought an over the top, strutting/thrusting maneuver would be appropriate when his team is down by 18 late in the game. That was awesome. If he wore a sign saying "I'm a giant douche" it wouldn't have been more effective than that dance.

GREEN BAY 28 - CAROLINA 10

4th Quarter

4:22 - To be fair, when there's a blowout on a game recap I can just jump ahead to the points of interest, I don't have to write about it. So there, that's my compliment to the announcers for the day. Drew Carter made a couple big plays for Carolina on the drive and gets the reward in a Touchdown. Jarret Bush was a step behind on the coverage.

GREEN BAY 28 - CAROLINA 17

2:46 - Grant seems to favor his right leg and he's down. That's not cool. I hate injuries late in games like these that are essentially decided. Hopefully he's fine. Crosby hits from 47. The ball looked like it was blocked but somehow got there. A little redemption for the rookie I guess.

GREEN BAY 31 - CAROLINA 17

Cool. All week long I tried to convince myself that this would be a tough game. I couldn't do it. I'm glad. This is the first time since 96-97 that I just felt the game was a win and it wasn't a concern and I was right. I think this team is legit folks. We'll see after these next two Thursday games of course, but I haven't felt this good about this team in a decade. The coach calls good plays, the players are fired up, and there isn't much in our way. It's already been a helluva ride, but these last two games have shown something new. We're not just scraping by against inferior teams. We're beating them. Beating. In every sense of the word. That's the second step (the first being of course, winning).


* I say "ironically" as xbox is not made by a Japanese company.

Wednesday, November 14, 2007

Celebrating the Viking Game

Here are some great articles you must read from the local Minnesota papers.

Childress Blows

Don't expect a big-name coach to come and rescue Minnesota Vikings

Golden Mullet Awards-Pack vs. Vikings



What a win for the Pack, are you kidding me? Just when I think the Vikings couldn't hit another low point....the boat....the playoff blowout in NY (55-0)...the Moss moon...they hit rock bottom, again. They lose 34-0 in Green Bay, and their only good player leaves the field broken. We still have a long way to go to be a great team, but let's enjoy this win.

Quarterback:






Perfect game by Favre. Three touchdowns, no picks, and over 300 yards once again.

Running Back:






Grant had over 100 yards and scored a touchdown....against one of the best running defenses in the NFL. Awesome.

Receivers:






A few dropped passes, but as a whole, this group was super awesome.

Special Teams:






Field goals and good field position, all we need now is Desmond back there. Get Woodson out before he gets hurt already.

Defense:






The best preference all year by the gang green.

Coach:






McCarthy made Childress look like a chump...I'm sure glad Childress picked the Vikings, that was close.

Viking Fans:






You guys are treading on thin ice. You're only days away from not selling out your next home game, your stadium blows, and you wear purple. Did I mention that I don't like the Viking fans? I just hope that your team doesn't move because you're not worthy of supporting the Pack. You deserve exactly what you got. Kinda makes you miss Tice now, doesn't it.

We've been lucky. We've won games that were close, and most things have gone our way. But, we have to make the most of this fast start. Even if we stumble a bit, getting to the playoffs is no longer the only goal, it's getting home field advantage. Now is the time when the team must stand together, get bigger, get better, get stronger, and become a team that's worthy of 8-1. We've been given a chance at greatness, now is the time seize the opportunity.

Sunday, November 11, 2007

Game Recap! Minnesota Vikings (3-5) at Green Bay Packers (7-1)

I'm excited. I was listening to Dave Sinykin on his Packer Preview show in the Twin Cities and there was a casual prediction of Packers 34 - Viqueens 17. I'm not even sure he was the person who made the prediction. It doesn't really matter. The point is, I think we might have an easy win today. I don't know why it didn't occur to me until someone mentioned it but it put a tingle in my bathing suit area so I'm gonna go with it.

There are many reasons for this; the lack of a legit player for the Vikings at QB being one part of it. The lack of professional quality wideouts being another. Or a tight end. Or a right guard, tackle, etc. Or a pass defense. The inability of modern science to provide 21 more Adrian Petersons through cloning so Minnesota could actually field a team with talent. Okay, why the hell would I not expect an easy win against this team? Other than a very good running back and a history of tight games what is there? I mean, the history doesn't even mean much when you break it down.

Brian Baldinger and Sam Rosen are in the booth for Fox today. I couldn't stand Rosen when he worked with Bill Maas the last few years but he's actually tolerable with "Baldy". Also, Baldy has the weird ass Larry McCarren deal with one finger just shooting off in it's own direction. Anything that reminds me of Larry's hands is a good thing. That last sentence is really, really bad when taken out of context.

Injuries - Bubba's out, Nick Collins is out. Antoine Winfield is out for the Vikings. That is huge. He's a decent cover guy and he's big in the run game. Without him they don't have much in the secondary. Tarvaris Jackson. Brooks Bollinger gets the start. Frankly, it doesn't matter. TJack is awful in a very specific way, which is "rookie/inexperienced guy". Bollinger and Kelly Holcomb are awful in the traditional "career 3rd stringer" way. The Vikings have no options here so even mentioning this as a potential point of interest is awkward and strained.

As always, when the opponent has the ball the comments are italicized.

1st Quarter

13:58 - First good sign of the day. On third and 1 the Swarmin' Mormon sticks Adrian Peterson for a loss. A punt shall be coming. From now on I'll be referring to Peterson as "AP". I do this for two reasons. One, he's their entire offense so I expect to write it often. Two, he wants to go by the nickname of "AD" for "All Day." I refuse. I mean, why go by a nickname like "AD" when your initials are "AP." That's just dumb. If you want to go by "All Day" then do it, but don't shorten it up to something that is very similary and actually rhymes with your initials. It's confusing for those of us who hang out with poor enunciators.

8:15 - The Packers have a nice drive going. They threw the ball 4 straight times to open the game and then Ryan Grant switched jerseys with AP. It's now 4th and 3 on the MN 35. We're going for it. 5 wides. My wife has discovered a dead mouse. Not ideal timing woman. I think Tivo was created by a guy who had to deal with this exact scenario...Ok, we're back, mouse is now amongst the mouselike angels in mouse heaven and KoRo just made a sweet diving catch of a wild pass from Favre. He then jumped up, moved exactly the 1 yard he needed for the 1st down, and got tackled. Heady play.

7:18 - Ryan Grant bursts through the right side for 30 yards and a touchdown! Great blocking, great running, nice little spin move to break a tackle at the end. That was cool. Man, if this team can run like that (44 yards on this drive) then we're legit.

GREEN BAY 7 - MINNESOTA 0

5:29 - On third and 6 from the GB 42 Bollinger fires a pass at absolutely no one. I rewound the Tivo and I still have no idea who it was intended for. I see the hamster running in your head there, how did the Vikings get to our 42? Mason Crosby learned a bad habit from Dave Rayner last week and kicked off out of bounds. One decent AP carry later and the Vikings were on our side of the 50. Fortunately Brooks realized he's terrible and ended the drive before any more hijinks could ensue.

1:15 - Seriously, what is going on? Grant has 8 carries for 81 yards thus far. He's had wide open holes and done something with them 4-5 times already. The drive stalls on a Jennings drop but it's nice to see us moving the ball completely balanced. It's also nice to see pretty cheerleaders on the sidelines. I'm not saying the camera showed them, I'm just saying it's nice when it does happen, whenever that may be. Cuz they're pretty, they pretend to be interested (or actually ARE interested), and uh, well... I'm gonna stop talking for a while.

2nd Quarter

15:00 - Wow. How have I not been called for a tryout with the Vikings yet? Bollinger whiffed again on a throw to their TE Shiancoe on 3rd and 6. Holcomb missed his receivers badly in our first game against them and now a totally different guy is missing the receivers. I just checked the stats, their best wideout is Bobby Wade according to catches, yards, TD's. He'd be lucky to be our 5th guy.

9:30 - 3rd and 8 on the MN 40. There was a false start on Spitz that pushed us back. Other than that the O-line has done a great job protecting Favre and getting the running game going. Favre hits Ruvell Martin for 25. 5 wides again. I'm liking this. My tv is too small to verify they're all wideouts (maybe Don Lee's in there somewheres) but the fact Ruvell made the catch is a good sign he was out.

7:00 - The running game reverts back to form and we're facing 3rd and 10. Donald Driver has the ball tip off his hands. Would have been a first down on the 5. He'll get the next one. Donald Driver is so dang dreamy. Crosby from 39.

GREEN BAY 10 - MINNESOTA 0

2:45 - That was a hell of a sequence. The Vikings pick up a first down on a carry by AP. Then the following occurs. Birk gets called for a false start. 1st and 15 - AJ Hawk sticks AP on a swing pass for a gain of 1. Great coverage. 2nd and 14 - Kampman chases AP all over the left side of the field for a 2 yard loss. 3rd and 16 - Meek draw call results in a punt. Nice work D!

2:09 - 3rd and 7 from the GB 23. Favre hits Driver over the middle for 17. Nice little scramble from BF. I've written his initials in my notes every week for two years and I've yet to do a BFF/Best Friends Forever joke. Sadly, this is because he returned the locket I made for him with my picture on one side and his on the other. I was pretty bummed out until Ingle Martin made me a locket. Now I can laugh about it. Ingle says hi. Oh, Favre also went over 60,000 yards in his career on that pass.

1:45 - 3rd and 10 from the MN 43. 5 wides again. Since the Vikings can't cover two wides this makes sense. Unfortunately no one bothered to block EJ Henderson on a blitz. Favre somehow managed to avoid the sack and pass to KoRo for a 9 yard completion.

:17 - Favre hits Driver for the 1st down but it eventually stalls on the 6 yard line with just enough time for a field goal. Crosby from 24. Still, that's the third scoring drive of more than 80 yards today.

GREEN BAY 13 - MINNESOTA 0

3rd Quarter

12:15 - Ryan Grant picks up seven off the left side. He's over 100 yards on the day. He's the first guy to do that against the Vikings this year. I failed to see this coming. I suck at life. Fortunately Ingle Martin is here to cheer me up by singing an ABBA song.

12:10 - Greg Jennings makes a great catch! 34 yards with his man draped all over him, he pulls in the jump ball and takes a hit from Sharper coming over to help out. Great play. We're down in the red zone again. Also, I regret to inform you that Ingle is not singing me an ABBA song, it's his own composition. It is not good. It is also very, very long.

9:29 - 1 yard TD pass to Don Lee. Playaction had to be honored thanks to Grant's domination today. This is looking way too easy.

GREEN BAY 20 - MINNESOTA 0

2:28 - The D forces another punt very quickly. Nothing of note happened except that Atari stripped the ball from Purple Jesus. PJ recovered however. KGB picked up a sack. These guys are playing fantastic and I'm not even bothering with them cuz the rest of the game is going so well. After yet another smooth drive of 60+ yards the Packers face a 3rd and 8 from the 8. Touchdown Ruvell Martin! He got behind Dwight Smith on a slant.

GREEN BAY 27 - MINNESOTA 0

2:12 - Bobby Wade just made a 10 yard reception. It was the first completion to a Minnesota wideout all day. He was called for offensive pass interference. On an unrelated note, the Vikings suck. If AP isn't setting a league record that day they ain't winning.

1:28 - Robert "Fergie" Ferguson beat Al for a 35 yard completion. The 1st of the day for Minnesota. Hey Vikings fans, you may want to enjoy that while you can. He won't make another play for at least 5 more weeks. AP gets hit on a short pass over the middle by Al. He's badly shaken up. Looks like he's holding his knee. I hope he's okay. The kid's got talent and it's fun to watch him. He's out for now. Hey, coach Childress, why is your only talented player in the game at 27-donut?

4th Quarter

14:44 -Hey! It's Jon Ryan! The Punter for the Packers! What the heck is he doing here? Oh, I guess he's...punting? Huh. Curious.

11:30 - Chuck Woodson has a pick. Mewelde Moore batted it into the air and Chuck grabbed it at the GB two yard line. Minnesota had been moving the ball once the Packers started laying back more but they can't punch it in.

5:38 - When mocking an opposing QB and daring him to throw it deep on you it's best to remember that your best days are behind you. Sharper, who did some talking because if he didn't talk he'd probably die, swatted an easy INT away from Ced Griffin and directly into the hands of Ruvell Martin for an easy TD. He's talked a lot and yet his D gives up 350 yards in the air every week, he doesn't make plays and he actually hurts his teammates in some cases. Yeah, you've been missed around here buddy. Enjoy playing in Suckville for Coach Sucksalot.

GREEN BAY 34 - MINNESOTA 0

5:31 - Because the Packers have some class and some brains they pull Favre. This game was over after the 1st drive. It was fun to watch the Packers pick up an easy win, break the backs of the misguided Vikings fans who thought their win over the Chargers last week meant they had a team worth following, and look good in the process. I can't wait to wake up tomorrow and read about "blown chances" and "bad luck" from the Vikings coaches. This win is a gift that keeps on giving.

AP looks like he'll be okay, the Packers are sitting on top of the world and the only negatives I can think of have to do with Ingle Martin living on my couch. Not a bad day.

FINAL
GREEN BAY 34 - MINNESOTA 0

Friday, November 09, 2007

A look back with the Minnesota Vikings

This game was so amazing, it needs no introduction. Do yourself a favor and watch it, and never, ever forget.

Golden Mullet Awards-Pack vs. Chiefs

Another amazing win on the road. Even during the Packers Super Bowl years in the late 90's they would have lost this game. So far this team is playing with a lot of guts and a bit of pixie dust. Let's hope this lasts until the end of the season.

Quarterbacks:







Another great day by Favre. He did throw a couple of picks, but he made the right throws when he needed to. It's great to see the long ball, I hope it lasts.

Running Backs:






What running backs? Somehow they still fool the defense's with the play action, so that's good.

Receivers:






This group has really come together, they actually play like a team!

Defense:






A great performance. It was nice to see Woodson with the TD, and Hawk with the interception.

Special Teams:






Solid as usual.

Coach:






This guy has put together the best road record yet for the Packers...ever.

Larry Johnson:






It was great to see after his TD dance (which he should have been fined for) that he hurt his foot. That's what John Lennon would call Instant Karma.


Look at us, 7-1. Pretty, pretty good. Up next we have the Vikes in a game that would she be able to handle. It's time for us to turn up the heat, don't sit back, let's fight fight fight! Skol Pack Skol!

Sunday, November 04, 2007

Game Recap! Green Bay Packers 6-1 at Kansas City Chiefs (4-3)

All right, we continue our tour through the AFC West with a stop in KC. For the record it should be noted that I like KC. The town's got some cool restaurants, some dedicated fans and a pretty cool history.

Items of Concern for the day:
#1 - Joe Buck being allowed to speak in public.
#2 - Tony Gonzalez. Hall of fame tight ends are always a problem. Hall of fame tight ends surrounded by Atari Bigby and the Swarmin' Mormon are another issue altogether.

This game feels a lot like last week. I feel like the Packers are the better team but the setting, the schedule and the random goofiness that is the NFL leave me feeling a bit worried. Fortunately I have Chex Mix and a good dog at my side. That's really all you need for a tough road game. Let's kick this pig!

As always, comments are in italics when the opponent has the ball.

1st Quarter

14:51 - Okay. Tony G has his first catch of the day. 7 yards. Say one thing about the Chiefs, they're not shy about who their main guy is. The D forces a 3 and out after that one play however.

9:41 - Dangit. The Packers were driving thanks to a nice mix of Ryan Grant (3-4 yards at a time) and the same pass play run back to back for 1st downs, other than flipping the direction it was the same deal. Unfortunately Favre overthrew Greg Jennings and was picked off. Jennings got a hand on it but it was high and wild.

8:21 - Atari Bigby...er, I'm sorry, after last week's debacle he is now officially known as "the much maligned Atari Bigby" drills Dwayne Bowe on a pass attempt over the middle. D-Bo is out of the game at the moment. I know the first initial, first syllable nickname system has been overused but I like D-Bo. Sounds like a Star Wars character. After the game you can find D-Bo at the Mos Eisley Cantina ladies.

3:35 - Absolutely nothing of note has occurred in the past 5 minutes. This will continue into the second quarter. This is what is known as "prime laundry folding time". I don't mean to brag but I knocked out two baskets of towels.

2nd Quarter

15:00 - A fairly mundane drive by Green Bay results in our first points of the day. It could have been more but Greg Jennings dropped a slant on third down that could have gone for serious yardage. I mean that literally by the way, it would not have gone for "goofy yardage" or "pensive yardage", only "serious yardage" is applicable in that sentence. Crosby hits from 48. I wonder what happened to the guy he replaced?

GREEN BAY 3 - KANSAS CITY 0

12:33 - Nick Collins nearly came up with a spectacular diving interception along the sideline. There was no challenge on the incomplete ruling. At first I was upset at this but then I noticed he was on the Green Bay sideline and his coaches and teammates saw he didn't get it. Anyway, that was fun. Still waiting on Nick to break out.

2:52 - After yet another Aaron Kampman sack (this time with Corey Williams in on it too) the Chiefs are forced to punt. If the right tackle for the Chiefs is a pop tart (and it's not unreasonable to think he is) then Kampman is a toaster. Favre hits Don Lee over the middle for a 1st down. Don breaks a tackle and scampers (yes, scampers) to the Chief 22 yard line. 44 yards on the play.

2:00 - The offense can't move it after that. We've just been informed that KC has the best Red Zone defense in the league. Super. Crosby hits from 37. During the commercial Fox labled next week's matchup between Dallas and New York as the "game of the year". Which of course should have been immediately followed by them saying "...on our station." Alas, twas not to be.

GREEN BAY 6 - KANSAS CITY 0

1:00 - The D forces a three and out. KC just looks scattered. They can't run much and they can't pass much (other than to Tony Gonzalez, of course). We'll have the ball with all our timeouts and 45 seconds or so.

:25 - Um. What? Favre got hit as he threw and gets picked off. KC returns it to the Green Bay 30. This is not ideal. You can't blame for getting hit on the hand as he threw, but if the rush is there why even throw it? Just eat it and take your 6-0 lead into the half.

:18 - After a pass interference call on TMM Atari Bigby the Chiefs have 1st and goal from the one. And now Larry Johnson has a TD. Wow. The Chiefs have something like 50 total yards and are leading at the half.

GREEN BAY 6 - KANSAS CITY 7

3rd Quarter

13:00 - I think AJ Hawk just made a tackle on special teams. Is there an injury or are we busting him down to private? Also, anyone notice that I'm so lazy I don't even put the periods after "A" and "J"?

11:00 - How is this game close? KC has 69 yards on penalties and 67 yards of their own. They also just picked up their first 3rd down conversion of the day. They're now 1 for 6. Thanks to Troy "Jinx" Aikman bringing it up. Way to go Troy. Nick Collins had his knee violently twisted on the tackle. Aaron Rouse has replaced him. Let's see how much that changes things.

3:22 - On 3rd and 1 from the KC 36 Ryan Grant gets stuffed. Crosby from 52. Pulled wide left. Well, at least we gave KC awesome field position. That's good.

2:03 - AJ Hawk picks off Huard and returns it to the KC 30. I think the highlight there was Hawk somehow managing to show off some nifty moves while also being in complete "coverup" position on the football. Put him in at tailback coach!

:24 - Jennings runs a little out and then slants across the middle. After 9 pumpfakes Favre hits him for the touchdown. We're back in this thing kids! Also, how much difference does Jennings make in this offense? Let the harping in the booth about not going for two begin in five, four, three...

GREEN BAY 13 - KANSAS CITY 7

4th Quarter

11:11 - I don't know if it's Collins missing or if the D is just tired but they just let KC put together their first legit drive of the day. Tony G had two big catches for 1st downs and the running game is doing just enough. They ran a pretty fake reverse that was actually a slow developing screen play for the TD. By the time LJ caught the ball he had blockers in position to go 30 yards untouched. That's not really an accomplishment by the way, I go untouched for far longer and no one says a dang thing.

GREEN BAY 13 - KANSAS CITY 14

11:03 - Well then. That was an example of not answering a challenge and also the opposite. Dave Rayner (former Kicker, pining for his days in GB) kicked off out of bounds giving us the ball on the 40. Then, Favre hits Donald Driver over the middle for 44 yards to answer KC's touchdown. He was double covered and caught it with one hand. Favre threw from his back foot and hit him in stride. We're on the KC 22 and I feel very pretty all of a sudden.

8:52 - The drive stalls when a blitz isn't picked up on 3rd and 8. Favre gets rid of it. Crosby hits from 32.

GREEN BAY 16 - KANSAS CITY 14

7:52 - AJ Hawk had a nice tackle on LJ to prevent a 1st down. He came down on Johnson's ankle and twisted it pretty bad. I'd be shocked if we see him again today.

6:24 - COVER THE FUCKING TIGHT END!

5:23 - COVER THE FUCKING TIGHT END WHEN HE IS IN THE END ZONE! Bigby late on the cover of Tony G. How can one man be this tough to stop? He's like the Master Chief of football players. The Chiefs went through quite the process to get their 2 point conversion. We had stops, and penalties, on their first two attempts. It was too frustrating and sad to recount here. By the by, Tony Gonzalez has 109 yards today. The rest of his team combined has 108. I think I spotted the weakness coach!

GREEN BAY 16 - KANSAS CITY 22

3:05 - For all the talk about us being a dink and dunk team we sure score quickly sometimes. Favre hit Driver for 11, KoRo for 10 and a first and then after an incompletion he hits Greg Jennings 50 yards downfield for the touchdown. Jennings just ran right down the middle and Favre hit him perfectly. 60 yards in all.

GREEN BAY 23 - KANSAS CITY 22

2:58 - Wow. That was way too close. Some dude* named Jeff Webb just missed putting KC at the Green Bay 40 by failing to get his second foot down on a deep ball from Huard. Some random assistant grabbed Mike III and told him to challenge and he just got it in. Thankfully Herm Edwards and his staff were caught sleeping too.

2:14 - KGB sacks Huard and a punt is coming. It's late in the game but KC has 3 timeouts and the 2 minute warning coming.

1:59 - Wow. Just fucking wow! Chuck Woodson returned the ball from the Green Bay 40 to the KC 30 on the punt. He also wasted the two minute warning. That's helpful. Great scrambling return.

1:44 - After three straight Brandon Jackson runs (Grant had that fumble against the Vikings) and three timeouts it's once again Crosby time. This time from 45. It's good.

GREEN BAY 26 - KANSAS CITY 22

1:35 - I know there's been some talk about Hawk being a little quiet lately. This game should take care of that. He just had great coverage and a pass breakup to force third down. He was running full speed and turned his head at the last second to avoid the Pass Interference call. Nice work.

1:00 - On 3rd and 2 from their own 40 or so Huard gets picked off by Chuck Woodson. Chuck being Chuck, he returns it 45 yards for the touchdown. This game is over.

GREEN BAY 33 - KANSAS CITY 22

17 points in the last 5 minutes or so thanks to big plays on special teams (Chuck) and the defense (Chuck). That guy might have a future in this league.

I didn't see any blown coverages or anything but KC's offense didn't do much until Nick Collins left the game. I wonder what effect that had on it. Not the prettiest, but it's another win. I'll take it.

* I like to use the "some dude" designation when referring to a player I have never heard of before despite far too much watching of HBO sports, NFL Network and the other big sports sites.

Friday, November 02, 2007

Golden Mullet Awards-Pack vs. Broncos

What a win for the Pack. 6-1....and we are getting tons of mail from jealous Bear and Viking fans. It's tough to sort threw it all. Keep them coming, I can almost feel the tears when I get them. On the awards.

Quarterback:

Perfect. Favre hasn't looked this good in years. I love the bomb to win the game...Tom Brady who?



Running Back:

Grant gets four for breaking 100 yards for the first time ever. That was amazing, let's do more of that.



Receivers:

They got most of what was thrown at them. Driver was a little quiet, but I guess he had more men on him then Kent Hrbek would ever dream of.


Defense:

Bend but don't break.




Special Teams:

Solid, but who cares....Favre won the game!





Coach:

A tough win on the road in a tough environment. Not only that, but he beat the genius that beat us in Super Bowl XXXII. Holmgren who?


Rocktober:

The Colorado Rockies want to trademark that word, but I think the Pack should. After the Rockies mile high collapse, the next night the mighty Broncos fell victim to the Pack. It's too bad that Rocktober is over, maybe it's time for Packvember.



6-1 looks pretty good, but what looks great is seeing the Vikings and the Bears in the bottom of our division. We've got a long way to go to be playoff contenders, but a fast start helps. Let's keep the offense rolling and tighten up on the defense...on to K.C.