Wednesday, September 06, 2006

Roll Call

So we've got our 53 players. That's nice. I have no idea how good they'll be (which is a nice way of saying that I hope they don't suck). I have little information to suggest the coaching staff is just biding their time until they start collecting super bowl rings. I have even less information to suggest that this team will still be starting Favre by week 10. That last one is discomforting, I know, but inevitable too.

I must say I'm happy to see the team going with younger, cheaper options rather than keeping around sullied veterans with spotty track records. Sure I had to spend a few extra minutes updating my roster on Madden 07 and that was a pain but I'm still happy to finally say goodbye to Mr. Pooper and the gang. I've always been distrustful of anyone named "Rod" so losing Mr. Gardner is acceptable as well. Particularly since our WR corps is not exactly stocked. If you can't beat out Fergie (the overly cautious wideout, not the overly sexed up mynx from Black Eyed Peas. For further clarification, the lady version sings "My Humps" while the football-playing but still lady-esque version sings "My Drops".) you don't deserve to make the team.

I'm also having a difficult time caring that Kenny Peterson and Cory Rodgers are gone. Peterson because, well, it's hard to make less of an impression than he has. I'm just happy to see Rodgers gone because of the name thing. I don't know how many times I've read some headline this offseason and wondered just what the heck Aaron Rodgers was doing just to find out that it was our new draftee Cory instead. "Rodgers involved in gun incident." Aaron no! "Rodgers may not make the cut." Aaron what did you do? "Rodgers caught dry humping heffer." Aaron...well I saw this one coming actually.

The games start for real tomorrow night. Charlie Batch vs. Daunte Culpepper's tiny hands. I'm thrilled. I'll be back on Friday with some predictions for the division, some vague analysis and maybe even a short story period hosted by Rock Gullickson*.

*That last sentence sort of came apart at the end there. I wouldn't count on Rock showing up, unless of course the books are really heavy and his unique free weight built muscles are needed. But that seems unlikely.

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