Monday, September 25, 2006

I feel our first win coming on...real soon

Ron Pitts and Terry Donahue will be announcing today's game. How soon will Donahue start in using "avoid" inappropriately? "He's got to work on his avoid." I don't get it, is this some general plan to make us all less intelligent? Let's start the countdown.

For some reason I am optimistic to the point of obnoxiousness about this game. I don't know if it's because the of what I saw in the loss to the Saints last week, the fact that everyone on the Lions is there because Matt Millen thought it would be a good idea, or general stupidity. I'm hoping it's not the last one there.

1st Quarter

14:10 - Paris Lenon starting at Linebacker. Okay now see this is a reason to feel optimistic that isn't based on my lack of intelligence.

13:54 - Jon Kitna starting for the Lions at present, and I suppose, for the foreseeable future. If Favre had retired I would have liked to see the Packers go after him as a potential backup/emergency plan if Rodgers failed to rise to the occasion. Kitna's not great by any stretch but he seems to fall under that category of lower tier starter/excellent backup that few teams have nowadays.

9:33 - For what I hope is the 10th of oh, roughly 8 million times, AJ Hawk shows a crazy burst of speed for a sweet tackle. We want to believe AJ, keep on doing that and we will. And yeah I totally just spoke for all Packer fans just now. It was a powerful moment.

8:30 - Ahman Green goes down after a 1 yard gain or so and is flopping around like his head is on fire and his ass is catching. Predictably, Ron Pitts and Terry Donahue make no mention of it.

7:00 - Greg Jennings (Certified Public Accountant) makes a great spin move on a depleted secondary and then just blows the doors off Dre Bly for a 75 yard touchdown. And if you think I was going to forget to mention Driver (mf pack's official Non Sexual Man Crush) with excellent downfield blocking then you are mistaken. GB 7 - DET 0.

6:22 - Brady Poppinga drills the TE for Detroit a little early for pass interference. But he was on the tv screen and actually near his man so I'm calling this a "win" for Brady.

4:15 - False start. Booooring. Why is it that whenever there's a false start, scramble for a fumble or whatever that the announcer feels the need to mention stuff like "Dre Bly says the Lions got it". Really? Is that news? Of course he's going to act like the other team failed in whatever endeavor they were going for. I understand the players getting fired up but why for the love of Lombardi would the announcers act like it has any merit?

3:50 - Shawn Bryson joins a long list of players already this year that have, at various moments, gotten Marquand Manuel to lose his jock on an easy TD. Marquand is becoming the "girl with a reputation" with how easy he gives it up. GB 7 - DET 7.

3:20 - Ahman is back in the game. No mention if he was hurt or what 10 minutes ago.

2:15 - Wow. Jon Ryan booms a 65 yard punt AND the Packers didn't have to automatically give up a couple 4th rounders to get it. Amazing! Remember kids, no matter what you think of Ted Thompson you at least have to acknowledge that Mike II treated draft picks like I do on Madden. Which is a video game with no real consequences. Just keep that in mind please.

2:05 - Manuel may not be great but he certainly knows what to do when a ball bounces into his lap. You take that ball and you score! That's what you do. Ahmad Carroll with a nice hit to jar the ball out and Marquand does the rest. GB 14 - DET 7.

1:27 - Terry Donahue "Kevin Jones is a tough down hill runner." I don't get it. Is anyone weak when they're running full speed at you? They're all kinda tough right?

:00 - Long TD to Roy Williams over the top. Our safeties are um, kinda not good. I don't know why the Motor City Kitties are bothering with anything other than long bombs to Roy or the ridiculously named Mike Furrey. We're going to either fall down or let them make a play at least 50% of the time. GB 14 - DET 14.

2nd Quarter

9:48 - And no, nothing of interest has happened in the past 5:12 if you're wondering. I took notes and still found nothing to mention except this little math equation... Running Game = Ass. But now Detroit has to waste a timeout due to the Packers going no huddle and catching them with their pants down.

8:10 - Again Detroit caught napping on the hurry up. I'm impressed so far with Mike III's playcalling. We can't run the ball at all but we're still keeping the defense on their heels.

7:50 - Rayner makes an easy FG. Yay. GB 17 - DET 14.

6:30 - Grenade! Everyone Down! Okay? Not a grenade? Just good blocking by the Kittie's O-line? Seriously Kampman, KGB and the two interior guys on the line all hit the turf at the same time.

4:40 - I really don't know why Detroit doesn't go deep every time. I like Al Harris a lot but he can be had deep. He didn't even jump for the ball. Was it because he knew the wideout was out of bounds? Or that it was Corey Bradford? I don't know. But then Detroit follows it up with a deep ball on the other side that Roy Williams just drops. Seriously, they could go to the Tecmo Bowl offense here and probably put up enough points to win.

1:45 - Ron Pitts "I've got me a new set of chains." Not since 1987 when my brother showed off his spiffy new gold necklaces have I heard that sentence. I kinda dig it.

:49 - Noah Herron probably reads the website here. I don't think that's a stretch at all. So he read it and saw that I thought he might be goofy enough to cheer for and had to make amends today. It's okay Noah. I hate you now. Thank you for fumbling on the Detroit 5 yard line.

3rd Quarter

6:45 - NSMC* gets an easy TD catch after Favre rolled out for approximately 12 minutes. You think there wasn't anything to note in the third quarter until 6:45 remained? Nope, that's how long Brett was looking for a receiver. GB 24 - DET 14.

6:04 - After a failed screen pass that Kevin Jones dropped and was then violently thrown on top of the ball by Nick Barnett Terry Donahue mentions "Jones wisely gets on dropped pass." Apparently "wisely" equals "violently thrown to the ground by #56." A few minutes later Kevin Jones "wisely" goes in untouched. GB 24 - DET 21.

2:10 - Ah camera work. If this were a bigger game there might be more angles to show whether Ahman fumbled the ball or if his knee was down. Since I love Ahman but trust him about as far as I can throw him I'm going to assume he fumbled but there's no angle to show it. There are benefits to being a lesser team.

1:25 - Wow, more camera suckage. On a reverse Driver comes around the corner and disappears. Okay, he didn't disappear, but the cameraman knows where his bread is buttered and follows Favre on a lead block RATHER THAN THE BALLCARRIER! I love Favre but uh, watching him throw a block when we don't know where the ball is?

4th Quarter

12:19 - Ahman Green scores on a simple screen pass. The O-line had formed a wall on the 1 yard line and escorted him in. Nice work O-line, nice work. GB 31 - DET 21

11:59 - So THAT'S what happens when Hawk actually gets to the qb. AJ gets his first professional sack by picking Kitna up, twirling him around like he was Stacy Keibler on Dancing with the Stars and then throwing him to the ground, which was decidedly not like Dancing with Stacy Keibler...regrettably.

6:20 - Nick Collins is a player that I like. I don't know if he'll be great or not but if he can somehow catch the freaking ball when it hits him in the hands he'll go a long way towards answering that question in the positive. Can he bend his fingers? Is it just a medical condition where they don't bend and that's why he failed to pick off Kitna's pass? What's the issue? Somewhere in here Detroit kicks a field goal. GB 31 - DET 24.

2:12 - On 3rd and 1 the Lions try a little funky run. Nick Collins and company reads it perfectly and sticks Jones for a loss. That was pretty.

1:54 - Corey Williams with a huge sack of Kitna on 4th down should end this one. Nice work big man.

:54 - Remember when I said I don't trust Ahman? This is why. You don't fumble with 54 seconds left when you're just trying to run out the clock. Suddenly the pizza I ate for lunch has become lodged in my throat. 100% awesome.

I'm impressed by Mike III here. They showed him briefly after the fumble and he didn't flinch, just said something to Al Harris and moved on. I didn't expect him to start crying or anything but it's nice to see the coach so unimpressed. It's possible he was just confused but I prefer to think he's just Pittsburgh Macho.

:00 - Kitna's heave to the end zone is knocked down. Suddenly I can digest food again. The Pack have a win. Favre with 3 tds and no picks. Jennings and Hawk proving themselves as capable starters. That was fun. Next week at Philly. And for some reason I'm feeling good about that one too. That's probably just the general stupidity talking though.


NSMC = Non Sexual Man Crush, Donald Driver

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Just to show you that we are not all evil and that we can appreciate when Farva does have a good game, the Good folks in Bear Territory would like to send our congrats! It's not every week that you are able to beat the Lions. This is only because the league does not allow the Lions to be played more than twice a year.

We should also remember that this is, according to Farvah, the best team that he has ever played with.

I do apologize for not commenting on your likefest with Brett earlier. He does sound like a special individual and not in that retarded way either. That was a seriously touching story and one that I will treasure in my heart for the rest of my days. Bravo Packer fans! Bravo

MF said...

Sweetness, try to keep up will ya? You're holding up the class. Favre said this team has the most talent but the least amount of experience. There's a difference there, it just might be too subtle for a Bears fan to understand.

By the way, the "farva" joke was funny right around the time they realized that Member's Only jackets were lame and stopped making them. That's your hot tip for the day.